Oct 16, 2014

What Makes Me Unfollow - A Rant

This isn't so much an advice post, as it is a self-realization one.

I've answered this prompt on a few other people's advice posts, and I said things like, "too many sponsored posts" or "no interaction with the blogger."  Sometimes their life just takes a turn and the blog content heads in a direction I'm less interested in.

But when I think about the blogs I've actually unfollowed, it's been primarily for one reason:

They said something mean.

Sounds childish, right?  But I'm not talking about snarky or sarcastic comments.  Those are all in good fun, and I really don't offend that easily.

I'm talking about unnecessary snideness, or outright assholeishness (making up some words here, bear with me).  Blogging is an incredibly zen-esque and de-stressing experience for me.  So when I start seeing a lot of negativity, or things that influence my life or my feelings in a non-positive way, I'm out.

That might sound harsh, but... you know what?  No, it's not.  That's life.

We're adults (most of us), and we're old enough to know that our actions have consequences.  In this case, the consequence is pretty small.  You put people down for no reason - I unfollow.  You use somebody's size/gender/race/orientation as the butt of a joke - I forget you ever existed.

That's not to say there's not other people out there who won't enjoy your particular brand of being mean to people.  But I don't have to put up with it.  And I won't.

Did you come here looking for advice and are now disappointed because I just ranted?  I'm feeling generous today, so here's a few posts other, more interesting people put together along the same lines:

Oh, and instead of ending this with a plaintive, "Can't we all just get along?" I'll reference you to The Nectar Collective's 15 Ways to Be a Good Human Today for some inspiration.  Some great (and easy) ideas that make me feel more optimistic just reading about it!

What makes you unfollow?  Do you have any one pet peeve that makes you crazy?


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6 comments:

  1. Lady YES! I have zero tolerance for that mean-girl mentality. I see it happening when little bloggers suddenly become "bigger" bloggers and they think they don't have to answer for their actions and that everyone will just "love them anyway." Nope. I'm ruthless with the unfollow. I think it's SO MUCH EASIER (this is just me, now, so I'm not sure if it's actually true) to be nice. Life people up instead of tearing them down! Life is a lot more fun that way (plus, who doesn't want all the friends? I like friends)!

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  2. Interestingly enough the biggest reason I've unfollowed several people is I'm just not interested anymore. I can only read a post by your dog so many times before I wonder if you're lacking material or hiding something.

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  3. If I'm not interested or if they whine too much, I stop reading.

    I don't stop reading if someone has a bad day or says something real that might offend someone. I respect everyone's right to speak their mind especially in their own space. I typically wouldn't read someone who's racist/sexist/homophobic anyway, so it's really not an issue for me.

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  4. I typically only un-follow people if they show no love in return. If I leave comments on the regular and they NEVER respond back to me...they are off my list immediately. Or if they seem to cliquish with others, I cant stand caddy bitches. Or if they are all sponsored posts all the time and no real content anymore.

    Or another reason would be something happens in their life (like get pregnant) and then completely turn their blog in to a mommy blog and I can no longer relate. If they still post regular posts, or recipes, or such...I will hang in there...but full on mommy...I have no interest.

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  5. I'll unfollow for the reasons that everyone else listed above. If a blog is mostly advertisements or sponsored posts or I don't connect with the blogger on any level, I probably wouldn't follow to begin with. But to make me unfollow, it's mostly due to getting the feeling that the blogger doesn't care if I'm there or not. Or any of his/her readers.

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  6. I feel like I have been complaining a lot lately. I didn't mean too and really didn't realize I was doing it, until a lurker from my real life called me out on it. When I stepped back I realized wow I have been angsty lately. So I don't unfollow for that reason, But sponsored posts all the time, and give aways annoy me.

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