May 5, 2015

Driving Douchebaggery - The 10 Most Rage-Inducing Driving Things

Driving.  It's infuriating.  And, as I'm sure you've deduced from my post about bumper stickers, I can get a little road rage-y.

Since I know I'm not alone on this one, let's talk about the worst of the worst.  Here's my top 10 driving pet peeves.  (As a side note: they're not all caused by douchebaggery, but I think it's a fun word so I used it anyway.)

The 10 Driving Things I Hate Most

1. Lack of Turn Signals

It had to be said.  Why does no one use them?!  I see lots of people complaining about it online, but obviously those aren't the people driving around in my area.  What's the deal here, anyway?  Do people forget?  Is it too much effort to flick the switch?

2. Not Using Headlights in Poor Visibility

Your headlights aren't for you to see the road.  They're for other people to see you.  Sometimes it's pouring down rain, and those grey cars are just blending in to the giant blur that is my driver's side window.  And it's safer for both of us.  If I can't tell you're there, what's to stop me from pulling out onto the highway right in front of you?

3. Aggressively Not Paying Attention

So it's annoying when someone's driving badly because they're on their phone.  It's also annoying when someone comes roaring up behind you and weaves around you and through traffic like Cruella Deville.  But when they do both at the same time, it's downright terrifying!  Imagine a momentary lapse of attention, while cutting it close to another car, while driving 20mph faster than everyone around you!  This so incredibly stupid!!!

4. Misplaced Consideration

So... I understand that you were trying to be nice when you stopped in a straight lane to allow me to turn.  But, usually not following standard right of way just confuses everyone.  Frequently the people who do this have a huge gap behind them, so it's not actually necessary, as I would have been able to turn just fine if they had not stopped.  And sometimes it's dangerous, in a case where there's multiple lanes and the other lanes didn't get "we're stopping out of turn" memo.

5. Slowing Down to Merge Onto a Highway

No!  You're making this so much harder!!!  Now we're going to pull out, be going way slower than everyone else, and either we'll slam on the gas to get up to speed, or they'll have to slam on the brakes to not ram into us.  Just get up to speed and find a hole.  Usually, if you're going the same speed as them, people will let you over.  If you're going slow, they're going to do their best to not get stuck behind you.

6. Double Parking

You're an inconsiderate jerk, and I bet your car's not even that nice.  End o' story.  (Exception: your truck/van/whatever is legitimately too large for one space.  Usually not the case.)

7. Blocking the Passing Lane

Fast lane, passing lane, whatever you want to call it.  Unless there is so much traffic that the left lane is as full as the right lane, don't hang out over there.  Pass whoever you're passing and then move.  If you insist on driving in the left lane, at least move when someone faster catches up to you.  It's not your job to enforce the speed limit, and keeping them trapped (and probably angry) behind you just puts you in a more dangerous driving situation, as they'll likely be tailgaiting.

8. Brights in the Fog

That extra light doesn't make it easier to see.  It just causes more light to be reflected back at you (and everywhere), causing even worse visibility.  Didn't anyone attend defensive driving?!

9. Cutting Someone Off Instead of Using Empty Space

I'll always get peeved when someone cuts me off.  But when there's nothing behind me but wide open space, and you put your turn signal on (or don't, as is often the case) and start to force your way in front of me, I'm not going to cooperate.  You'll probably win in this game of chicken, because I've got too many accidents behind me to intentionally cause another, but I'm going to make it difficult for you.  On principle.

10. Parking Lot Vultures

Unless there is NO parking left at all, do not follow me to my car so you can get a closer spot.  You can walk.  It's not that hard and it's even good for you!  Equally bad are the cars that get in your way while they wait for you to move.  Uh, yes, I do require some space to pull out of this spot.  No, it's not more fun to have to do a 3-point turn to get around you.

I'm going to stop at 10, and I tried to avoid the obvious ones like: people being jerks, tailgating, and cutting in line when an exit is backed up.  But I'm sure there's more!

What are your driving pet peeves?  Any defensive driving tips the rest of the world seems to have missed out on?

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  1. You should never ever move to a tourist area, all of the above happen anytime I drive May - Sept. It's very scary to drive on the main thoroughfare here during those months, it's a gamble every time.

  2. Ahhhhhh all of those things certainly induce rage!!! Also, riding my ass when there is traffic will piss me off to no end!!! There is a road on the way to my house that you have to go 40 MPH on because first of is winding and hilly and sort of dangerous to go any faster...but also because the cops are on it there and will pull you over for just going a few mph above. When someone rides my ass on that road when I am doing between 40-45 mph...I get pissed. Then I have to become a bitch and drive about 30-35 just to make my point. I love watching the assholes loose their shit in my rear view mirror...punching their steering wheel and giving me the finger. Hehe.

  3. So glad I don't have a car/drive. I can barely be a passenger, I get so riled up. People are DUMB. I've been known to get really mad at #10 when I take my mom's car to a shopping mall - if they don't leave me room to pull out, I'll just get right back out and go back in the mall for awhile.

  4. um, yes to all of these! i cannot stand when people think they are being nice but they are just being stupid and screwing traffic up. lol

  5. and when they slow down to almost a stop to turn in somewhere. You do NOT need to practically stop in order to turn!! See I am getting stabby just thinking about it.

  6. i hear ya! people on their phones that aren't paying attention, like they're texting when driving ON THE INTERSTATE. i've almost been hit head on from that. scared the crap out of me.


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